Saturday, September 12th, 2024
Early Access + Express
ARRIVAL
Arrived at 4:30pm with little wait for parking or security. Waited for some friends until about 4:45pm and walked in right around 5pm. Got our wristbands and Express passes directly at the turnstile with ease (LOVE that as the system for entry bands, btw) and went straight to Dreamworks to pick up our Fast and Furious credentials. They said to get to the ride by 9:30pm and we should be fine, so we held off from hitting it first. Went down the stairs and tried to get to Jurassic World before it closed at 5:30pm but we got there literally seconds too late. Time for the first maze!
KILLER KLOWNS FROM OUTER SPACE
[Advertised Wait: 15 minutes. Time In Line: 5:38pm. In the Maze: 5:40pm.]
When this maze first came out, it was a marvel and the second time, the clowns didn’t seem into it at all. This time? They were firing on all cylinders again. Not quite like its glory days, but close enough. I am only docking points because it’s old, but honestly, it was a good time.
C+
STRANGER THINGS 5
[Advertised Wait: Blank. Time in Line: 5:49. In the Maze: 5:50pm.]
I thought the facade area actually looked pretty good and when I soaked up the environment a bit more on my second run through later in the night (this review will be about both run throughs), I actually thought it worked atmospherically. Maybe it just needed some more fog. Off the bat, this maze felt better than the other Stranger Things mazes in terms of tone. I think they utilized Vecna better than the last maze and I also thought the Demos looked WAY better than they ever have. The hospital hallway with the soldiers being eaten and the one on the ground got me pretty good. There’s some pretty great sets in here, like the tunnel, the melting set, and the military base fight with the jeep. I don’t care much for the main character scares, that just seemed like an odd choice, but I guess better than them being mannequins like before. With that said, it did feel like someone could pop out of truly anywhere, and quite often they did, which made this feel very action packed compared to the last ST mazes. Overall, I think they hit all the strong, scary points of the season. However, the maze’s finale happens a bit too quick and is distracting with not-Millie Bobbie Brown being utilized on screen and trying to have an emotional payoff Purple Rain ending in just one short room. All in all, I honestly think this is the BEST Stranger Things maze we’ve had in terms of scariness and impressive sets. To me, it felt like their money finally went somewhere and perhaps the negative reviews for this house, people are just jaded or over it. I get it, but looking at it as a maze, it is insanely solid and comparable to everything else at the event not only in this year, but of yesteryear. If anything, I wish it was longer to really fulfill its potential. If this is the send off, I think they did mostly well, they should’ve just expanded that final Vecna fight by getting rid of the Eleven disappearing video Magic card (which really is an insane sentence but that’s the only proper way to describe it haha).
B+
OZZY OSBOURNE: PRINCE OF DARKNESS
[Advertised Wait: 10 minutes. Time in Line: 5:59pm. In the Maze: 6:12pm.]
Everything presentationally about this maze is well put together with love and the cast was rocking it, but to me, it just felt…generic. Like ooh, werewolves and bats and dead things. It had some really cool parts though from the cast all ganging up on you and my friends liked it, I just wanted something a little more unique instead of feeling like Universal Monsters: Ozzy Osbourne. WAY better than the Black Sabbath maze many years ago, so at least there’s that. I feel it could’ve really gotten weird instead of sticking to basic horror tropes. Crazy Train being the most unique thing, and doing nothing really special with it, felt like there weren’t many ideas. The asylum is where I started to think, “oh, so it’s gonna feel like stuff we’ve seen before.” And sure enough — dusty crypts. Highlight of the maze is the giant bat animatronic was AWESOME. I get a lot of these things are from Ozzy’s discography, image, and persona, but it mostly felt like an excuse to bring some stuff out of the archives and catering it to Ozzy, which is not what I expected from this maze at all and figured that’d be Killceanera (more on that later). Anyway, not for me, but major props to the cast, so I’m giving this a grade higher than I’d probably want to give it.
B-
RIDES ON THE LOWER LOT DON’T OPEN UNTIL 7PM
They have NEVER done this during early entry and it really ruined plans of hitting all the rides, especially since Mario Kart closes early at 10pm, with some rides in the park also closing at 11:15pm or whenever. We figured we’d just come back down for Mummy and Transformers, and miss Mario, and head up to Fast and Furious for now.
FAST AND FURIOUS: HOLLYWOOD DRIFT
[Advertised Wait: Blank. Time In Line: 6:29pm. On the Ride: 7:05pm.]
Literally nobody got in line after us the entire time we were there, not sure what happened, but the line itself was taking awhile. Very slow loader. The locker situation is also silly. Unfortunately, I was not able to ride as a husky boy because the lap bar wasn’t getting to their mark — apparently I was close, but Universal’s policy to refuse to push down for you is a bummer. This has happened also on Harry Potter, and they insisted they can’t push down anymore, but my wife could, which in that event, she got it to lock in — on this ride, my wife was already in place, so they wouldn’t allow her to do it. Like, just push down for me, come on! My friends all loved the ride though and it was the highlight of their night. Guess I’ll try again next year.
CLUB JUKE
[Time in Line: 7:10pm. Got a Drink: 7:31pm]
Decided we could use a drink so we went to go experience this since it was close by. The line was long but figured at this point we were far from all the other bars, so why not just wait. Also, since when is it Universal’s policy to only give you one drink at a time? I’m definitely going to get more than one and I don’t want to have to wait in line again! Dumb policy. I got the Irish Long Island and it was weak — typically the most strong drink and I taste zero alcohol and feel nothing?! Everyone else said their drinks were weak too and we all had different bartenders. Don’t know what their instructions are here, but clearly it’s not to make good drinks lol. Honestly, just avoid this place. Thematically it doesn’t make sense with Sinners either to have Club Juke be in an Irish bar anyway. Like huh? Lol They easily could’ve called it something else and still have it be Sinners themed.
FORTNITEMARES
WTF even is this zone? Like seriously, I did not get it at all.
F
SHRIEK OF THE BANSHEE
Saw the stilts guy going low after people all night, what a trooper. Hated the little skeleton caravan thing they use all the time though, they could’ve done without that.
B-
DEATH EATERS
No alley way? No point. Not much ambience or scares happening here. They were trying though. Bring back the alley or why bother. They did a little show outside of Three Broomsticks every once and awhile, which I randomly caught, but it doesn’t make up for no alleyway.
D-
FREAKY NIKKI
Saw Nikki on the way to Curious George and I simply said “hi Nikki.” Figured it was too late to say the code word. She just stared at me and everyone else, but every once and awhile, she’d attack with a brick and just go back to staring. Didn’t feel super interactive and just more like old school scare actors, which isn’t the point, but maybe she wasn’t feeling it tonight or in that moment or she was just trying something new. Sadly, this was the only time I saw her.
HELLRAISER
[Advertised Wait: 5 mins. Time in Line: 7:48pm. Time in Maze: 7:52pm.]
This would’ve fit perfectly in with the 2007-2012 slasher mazes. The facade and music is pretty haunting. First room with chains and first sighting of Pinhead is cool, but needed a scare around here, but they make up with that hitting you with all the Cenobites in one quick hallway right after. One thing that bugged me is there’s a TV with Pinhead’s face stretched out — um, fix the aspect ratio here guys. A highlight is definitely the “doctor is in” scene, presentationally the way you walk into the room and they hit you with that moment is just impressive — just wish there was another scare here. The mattress kill is GREAT and such a good scare. Hanging bodies section definitely gets you close to the scare actors on the sides in some well positioned hiding spots. The way they were blend in such a beautifully captured moments and hide a scare somewhere in there just made this maze very intense and it truly felt like they are staffing it all the way up. Just all around, what an impressive and gruesome maze that really showed love for the films and the monsters. Loved the Chatterer sound, that was definitely creepy and I felt like there was a good variation of Cenobites and locations in general. At this point, I definitely felt like the mazes were kicking up a notch.
A
EVIL DEAD BURN
[Advertised Wait: Blank (why are all these signs blank?!. Time in Line: 7:58pm. Time in Maze: 8:01pm]
I hated this movie, but low-key, loved this maze. It oddly also felt very Evil Dead, which I don’t think the movie did well enough and it’s strange that the maze could convey that tone better. The opening facade scare and talking head at the beginning following me was AWESOME. Scare of the night happened early on and I was just reading the book of the dead pages out loud then got hit with a well positioned scare actor or two, just wasn’t expecting it that early. Major shout out to the Thya actress, they picked someone who really embodied that role. Wish they did the dishwasher attack, but at least it’s kinda represented. I think the last bit of the maze is kinda murky storytelling wise for those who haven’t seen the movie, so I wish they did something different here instead. It literally just randomly ends, which sucks, but oh well. But there is an energy to this maze that keeps things flowing, tonally dark, and scary that I don’t think any of the Evil Dead mazes of the past have been able to convey. The soundtrack also helps quite a bit. Overall maze though was VERY HOT (intentional, I assume) so I was glad to get out of there, but I’m happy the maze worked and I got some good scares in it.
A-
MOE’S
Since our first drinks sucked, had to get another one. This was nice and quick and our drinks were strong. We came back here right after Terror Tram too to get another round, this time with a slightly longer wait, but we knew it’d be worth it at least.
BLOOD BOG
I’m a sucker for a good bayou theme and there was some nice heavy thick fog when I went through, so I was very happy. Unfortunately, it was just too crowded in this spot when I went, but the scare actors were rocking the spot.
A-
TERROR TRAM featuring ART THE CLOWN
[Advertised Wait: Blank. Time In Line: 8:48pm (after a LONG cluster just to get to the escalator). Time on Tram: 8:52pm.]
Much like Hellraiser, this felt like old school HHN. I have to say, quite possibly might be one of the best Trams they’ve ever done and I am not a Terrifier fan at all. But they really utilized the hell out of Art, Emily Crane, and the Little Pale Girl. While also throwing everything Dark Christmas and Holidayz in Hell in there that they could throw in. This being Christmas themed also really just amped it up in a way that gave it so much life and it even started great from the hilarious opening video. You get all these little golden nuggets of moments from this theme with Art injected in like the Christmas tree farm, advent calendars, and elves getting killed in typical Terrifier ways. One spot I should note, the chainsaw sound at the motel is nowhere near loud enough. I loved the Christmas cafe and family dinner moment where it turns into a literal maze for a bit with a bit of a roof. The Ice Nine Kills song was fun, don’t get the criticism of it, it helps bring an insane energy to the whole thing that I don’t think last year’s maze had. The Hollywood sign and Psycho house portion need a bit of help with something here to not make these moments so boring, but things pick back up at War of the Worlds. The machine gun moment is INSANE and people were cheering Art like crazy here (which he ofcourse then just shoots you). I remember thinking they hadn’t done anything with the plane yet and that’s when I noticed a “Santa Airlines” logo — nice touch. The naughty list trigger scare is awesome. And the final rooms were great and the whole experience felt complete. No chainsaw scare actors at the end when I went so it didn’t feel complete for me, but saw a video they usually are there, so that at least makes the whole thing feel like a solid experience. I would not be mad if they repeated this again next year, it was an absolute delight. And once again, the Terror Tram is one of the best parts of the night, I want to say three years running with their new semi-maze format. Well done.
A