Sorry, folks. I've watched a few POVs now, and I am extremely underwhelmed. Baffled, more like. Frankly, it feels like there's probably some truth to that "Iger said this was boring" tale.
Unlike Splash Mountain, Tiana's directly involves the audience in the story's progress. We are meant to help do something, and the characters speak to us. On Splash, we are only witnesses to Brer Rabbit's adventure, and only the vultures directly address us. This creates a very different kind of atmosphere and calls for different storytelling levers, as the characters need to actively acknowledge us. Unfortunately, because our goal/the stakes are so unclear, most of this dialogue is spent telling us we've done something or reiterating what we still need to do. Nothing is self evident... everything must be explained. All tell, no show. This, to me, speaks to why the ride feels so inert. It's something I've seen in quite a few newer experiences... we keep being essentially told we're having fun and/or have accomplished something. But we literally round the corner after the first drop and find a whole band of critters! What on earth is the rest of the ride supposed to be about? Oh... finding... more critters? Okay...
But there isn't even any fun in finding those critters. They just appear in front of us already playing instruments. There isn't any creativity or whimsy in locating them... nothing pops out of a hiding place, nothing starts to play an object that couldn't possibly be used as an instrument (i.e. a spiderweb with sticks as a ukulele, like in the movie), it's just already happening in front of you, with Tiana and Louis repeatedly insisting we're doing a great job. Okay! Is there any chance we'll encounter a conflict somewhere in this ride? Or is it just going to be the same beat slammed over and over?
Also, I hate to say it, but while the finale room looks great and the Tiana and Louis animatronics throughout are spectacular, the rest of the figures are Little Mermaid quality - which is to say, barely animatronics at all. Many of the Splash Mountain animatronics weren't particularly dynamic, either, but they most tended to have more than a single motion. (When they worked properly, the frogs bobbed and turned and sang - and their eyes moved. Here, the equivalent figure just rocks back and forth, face frozen.) There's already so little to look at during most of the ride's scenes that these limitations become tougher to ignore.
It's ultimately just weird on a conceptual level. It's a Princess and the Frog ride that seems determined to use as little as possible from the movie. You've got some of the music, sure, but Tiana may as well be a completely different character. Naveen and Ray, the two characters who I'd argue do the most to push and round out the film's core ensemble, are not present. (Yes, Naveen has one non-speaking figure in the finale. What happened to his voice actor returning to supply new dialogue?) You've got Mama Odie doing arbitrary magic, I guess.
Yes, this needed Facilier. It needed conflict, it needed stakes, it needed more playful and thoughtful visuals. It's going to be tough to criticize this ride because of the unfair expectations placed upon it (and the instinct to dismiss dissatisfaction with latent racism), but in my opinion, this doesn't work on a fundamental level. I think it needs emergency Little Mermaid 1.0 levels of help.
