Unfunny, meandering and chaotic. There's good intentions all over the place but none of it syncs up. The queue has good ideas and an actual terrific idea for a preshow, showing GotG bickering with each other.
But it's not funny. None of their "jokes" land. A Stan Lee cameo lands but it's Stan Lee... of course it lands. Everything he does is hilarious.
The preshow has an excellent Rocket Raccoon AA who also doesn't say anything funny. The story pointed here is a little more sensible than I thought it would be, but again: there's just not much. (Walkman effect at the end is decent as well)
Boiler room is literally the old ToT one with some new lighting and props. Gross.
Then we get to the ride. When the shadow effects are the best part of the attraction, that's embarrassing. The rest of it is just an absolute, nonsensical mess. We're constantly in motion pinging from one area to the next, lost in the chaos of this ride with no laughs to be discerned. There's zero build-up and almost no coherent story to latch onto. At least ToT had pacing and a build-up... this is just a mess. Thrill junkies will like the intensity of the attraction, but what a downgrade. They clearly had no idea what to do with this, so they thought masking it with the film's "attitude" would work.
Look, I go to see Guardians of the Galaxy for laughs and action. This provided neither. Try again.