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Clueless Guests Quotes

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1975rk said:
I am laughing as I read through these! LOL...

One that I heard last December was this guy at Guest Services inside Islands of Adventure... Not sure if he was stupid or just a scammer...
He claimed that his ticket wouldn't let him get in Universal Studios park. The guy behind the counter says "well, you have a 1-day 1-park ticket and you are already inside a park"... the guest says "yes, I downgraded my ticket this morning... for universal studios".... mind you, this was already after lunch... they offered him the option to upgrade the ticket back again to a 2-park ticket and he refused saying he wouldn't pay more... even though he had already spent the day at IOA... LOL
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I work in general customer services sounds like a cheapskate trying to get something for nothing :p
 
I got a good one. I was at MK last week and I was riding Small World. When we got to the finale where everyone is dressed in white, a girl on the boat says "Where is this? Iceland?" :bang:
 
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at least 3 times a day when I used to work there..."what time is the 3:00 parade?"

Guest: "Why is the park so crowded?"
Me: (under my breath) "because you're here"

Guest: "where's Hulk?"
Me: "That's not located at MGM studios...that's at Universal"
Guest: "No, the advertisement said it was here"
Me: "Sorry but that attraction is not here"
Guest: "But I want to ride it? where is it?"
Me: "If I could teleport it here, I wouldn't be working here"

Me: How many in your party?
Guest: 26
Me: I'm sorry the train only fits 24, you'll have to split everyone up in groups of 2
Guest: But we all want to ride together
Me: I'm sorry, but that's impossible.
Guest: Can't you just put another car on the train?
Me: (long pause with a did you really just say that look on my face" No (to the rest of the group) EVERYONE! Find a riding buddy. (they all get buddies) Do you have your riding buddy? (smattering of yes's) Ok everyone, 2 to a row,

Guest: Can I hold your chainsaw?
Me: no
Guest: why not?
Me: Cause I need it to rip you apart
 
giant4203 said:
at least 3 times a day when I used to work there..."what time is the 3:00 parade?"

Guest: "Why is the park so crowded?"
Me: (under my breath) "because you're here"

Guest: "where's Hulk?"
Me: "That's not located at MGM studios...that's at Universal"
Guest: "No, the advertisement said it was here"
Me: "Sorry but that attraction is not here"
Guest: "But I want to ride it? where is it?"
Me: "If I could teleport it here, I wouldn't be working here"

Me: How many in your party?
Guest: 26
Me: I'm sorry the train only fits 24, you'll have to split everyone up in groups of 2
Guest: But we all want to ride together
Me: I'm sorry, but that's impossible.
Guest: Can't you just put another car on the train?
Me: (long pause with a did you really just say that look on my face" No (to the rest of the group) EVERYONE! Find a riding buddy. (they all get buddies) Do you have your riding buddy? (smattering of yes's) Ok everyone, 2 to a row,

Guest: Can I hold your chainsaw?
Me: no
Guest: why not?
Me: Cause I need it to rip you apart
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What ride were you working on holding 24? Just curious?

And the chainsaw one in awesome dude :pound:

I'm sure you lose count the amount of times people trying to come up and scare you
 
giant4203 said:
at least 3 times a day when I used to work there..."what time is the 3:00 parade?"

Guest: "Why is the park so crowded?"
Me: (under my breath) "because you're here"

Guest: "where's Hulk?"
Me: "That's not located at MGM studios...that's at Universal"
Guest: "No, the advertisement said it was here"
Me: "Sorry but that attraction is not here"
Guest: "But I want to ride it? where is it?"
Me: "If I could teleport it here, I wouldn't be working here"

Me: How many in your party?
Guest: 26
Me: I'm sorry the train only fits 24, you'll have to split everyone up in groups of 2
Guest: But we all want to ride together
Me: I'm sorry, but that's impossible.
Guest: Can't you just put another car on the train?
Me: (long pause with a did you really just say that look on my face" No (to the rest of the group) EVERYONE! Find a riding buddy. (they all get buddies) Do you have your riding buddy? (smattering of yes's) Ok everyone, 2 to a row,

Guest: Can I hold your chainsaw?
Me: no
Guest: why not?
Me: Cause I need it to rip you apart
Click to expand...

I never realized you worked at MGM Giant. Love the Great Movie Ride one about adding on a train...I would have just face-palmed and walked away shaking my head. On a side-note: Looking forward to having you scare me again at HHN 21!!!
 
Not really a "Stupid Guest Quote", but more of a "Stupid Jaws Skipper Quote".

By Old Universal Lover from IOA Central:

I went to both Islands of Adventure and Universal Studios Florida today with some visiting relatives and in the after noon, we decided to ride Jaws and walked right on. I was wearing a checkered shirt and when we got to the end of the queue, I decided to store my HD Sony Camcorder in my chest pocket so it wouldn't get damaged from the water, however the top of the camera case was still visible but the cam was TURNED OFF THROUGHOUT THE WHOLE RIDE. Anyways, the Skipper we had that day was the most anal, obnoxious, power hungry skipper that I have ever seen at JAWS. Most skippers are really friendly to ride with, and are always nice to me, good with the themeing, etc. This guy today was an extreme jerk in several ways which I am about to explain (I won't mention his name in case of stalking/privacy concerns, but if you want to know it, then please personal message me). Anyways, when we boarded the ride when he was going over safety rules, when he mentioned about no photography or videotaping he says "you shouldn't have even bruoght those cameras with you so don't even think of bringing them on the ride or Chief Brody will arrest you". After we left the station and throughout the ENTIRE RIDE the Skipper was barely looking over at the shark or what was going on in the ride but 99% of the time he kept his eyes sharply on the guests, intensively scanning everybody to see who was breaking what policy. The best way to describe the guy would be to say that he's a male version of Professor Dolores Umbridge from Harry Potter. By that, I mean he was like her in how he acted cutesy, but if somebody did something he didn't like he would harshly chastise them and seemed to enjoy doing that. He also temporairly stopped the ride at least three time to yell the heck out of people:

1)He stopped right near Steven's Cannery and Chief Brody's house to make a foreign lady who was taking pics of the scenery put away her camera. At first she just turned it off, but then he STILL wouldn't continue the ride, and kept telling her she had to have it securely fastened inside a zipped pocket immediately, or he would call security.

2)Stopped the tour boat right when you first see JAWS before going into the Boathouse to yell at two woman at the row in back of me because one of them brought food wrapped in papaer onboard and was holding it in their lap, and the other woman next to her was drinking from her water bottle. He complained that eating/drinking were strictly prohibited and they shouldn't have even brought them on the ride then demanded they pass their food and water bottle up the rows to him, then he put them in some box at the front of the boat.

3)At the finale of the ride where JAWS bites the high voltage barge A TON of people in the boat pulled at cameras and recorders, so he stopped the ride again and did the same thing he did to the lady earlier in the ride, except this time he said something like "You idiots! Put them all away! The show is over! and you're clearly in violation of many rules".

Also, at the part where the oil tank blows up, my uncle said something like "whoa, that's hot! Wer'e right in the fire!" and the Skipper chastised him with "SIr, talking is prohibited while aboard". Then the worst part was what he did to me. It at first started at the gap in the ride between the oil dock and the voltage barge, where he started scanning the audience like a robot yet again, then starts peering over at me and looking me down. And starts pointing at me saying "No, sir. That's prohibited. No, No." Everybody in the boat started looking around in a sort of "Is he talking to me?" manner. I couldn't understand why the bastard was scolding me when I wasen't videotaping, taking pictures or breaking any rules AND hold my cam stored in my pocket. Then, when were exiting the ride, the Skipper (who still had his microphone turned on) says (exact words):

"Sir? Sir? Yes, you. If I see you bring a camera onto a ride ever again, I'll have you kicked out of the park. Got it?"

I was soo pissed off, I was about to argue to the Skipper that the warning signs in the queue DO NOT SAY "Store all loose articles in lockers or with a non-rider" or "loose articles are prohibited but just "secure and protect loose articles". I had my stupid camera in my pocket during the whole ride. JAWS is not considered a no loose articles permitted ride. I didin't have it out. I wasen't videotaping. Hundreds of tourists bring their cameras to theme parks, including Universal. So why was the Skipper thretening me about how I villated policy and could get kicked out when I didn't brerak any f***ing rules? My uncle even called the Skipper a "jerk ass" afterwards. I am so scarred and angered by this particular incident that I am considering not even riding JAWS ever again. That's how pissed of I am at the Skipper. I've been on the ride thousands of times before where I had a camera and the Skippers didn't say anything. Then this guy threatens me cuz I brought one (turned off) to his attraction at a THEME PARK??!! I didn't get the chance to report him to Guest Services today, but am planning to call Guest Services phone-line tomorrow to file a complaint.

Thoughts?
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There was a day when Rock n Roller Coaster was down for about 8 hrs...they had a bunch of us stand at the entrance gate under the upside-down car letting people know the ride was down....

Me: I'm sorry sir, we're experiencing technical difficulties right now, please check back with us later, or at the tip board down the street.
Man: Dude what happened? Are people stuck upside-down?
Me: No sir, nobody is stuck. We're experiencing technical difficulties.
Man: Dude, you can tell me, what really happened?
Me: Oh I can?
Man: Yeah dude come on
Me: Well I probably shouldn't say, but one of the boats sank.
Man: OH MY GOD! (promptly goes back to his family and tells them, and they all have the same OMG reaction)
Me: (Turns away, trying not to laugh my ass off)

Vyrus said:
What ride were you working on holding 24? Just curious?

And the chainsaw one in awesome dude :pound:

I'm sure you lose count the amount of times people trying to come up and scare you
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Rock n Roller Coaster :)
 
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In line for Star Tours

Guest: (referring to Chewbacca) Look, it's one of those Ewok things!!! (I literally facepalmed after this)


In Line for Great Movie Ride

Little girl: Mommy, IS this a ride?
Mom: No, I think it's a movie.

Closer to the boarding station

Little girl: (sees Ride vehicle) I though u said this was a movie?
Mom: (trying to cover up her mistake) No, it's a ride.
 
Today in USF.

A family walking past Richters Burger restaurant...

Dad (Looking at map).. "OK, they have The Mummy and Twister. I dunno what they are, oh wait, Mummy is a show, Twister is.... I dunno what Twister is, probably a coaster."

One of the kids. "Cool, can we ride the twister Dad?"

Dad.. "Sure."

Me: Face palm.
 
On JP:RA
Guest to Pssitacosaurs: Look Raptors son!
Me:Uh no those are Psitacosaurs
Guest:What are those?
Me:An ancestor to Trcieratops
Guest:No triceratops had long necks
Me:...........

On Spider-Man Ride
Mom Guest:Look honey were flying!
Me:Thats a bad thing in this ride.....
 
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